CMo in Springfield

You, too, can make your own (you’ll have to take a screenshot for something like the above, though)

Four things

Old meme, but I’m compelled…

FOUR JOBS I’VE HAD IN MY LIFE:
1. camp counselor
2. resident advisor
3. conference coordinator
4. porn star. or maybe it was internet consultant. one of the two.

FOUR PLACES I HAVE LIVED:
1. Ogden, UT
2. Cedar Park, TX
3. NYC
4. Lacey, WA

FOUR TV SHOWS I LIKE TO WATCH:
1. The Office
2. Friday Night Lights
3. The Colbert Report
4. Footballer’s Wives

Actually, that just about covers the entirety of TV shows I like to watch.

FOUR PLACES I’VE BEEN ON VACATION:
1. Cancun
2. Victoria, Canada
3. Orange County. No, seriously. It sucked.
4. El Reno, OK

FOUR OF MY FAVORITE FOODS:
1. pizza
2. thai
3. almost any kind of bread
4. pizza!

I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW:

1. Wherever Jamie’s at. I can hear your cutesy-pie groans from here. Quit it.
2. NYC
3. Paris
4. Tropical beach. With good service and no party peeps. Perhaps on the med. Whichev

FOUR FRIENDS I THINK WILL RESPOND:

none

FOUR PLACES I LIKE TO SHOP:
1. Bookstores
2. Funky boutiques in the artsy sections of towns
3. Real estate websites
4. Shoe stores

Better questions:
FOUR RECENT BOOKS YOU’VE LIKED
NAME FOUR PRESIDENTS WITHOUT LOOKING ANY UP
FOUR FAVORITE NUMBERS
FOUR FAVORITE TOES
FOUR FAVORITE SUPREME COURT DECISIONS, AND IF YOU SAY BUSH V. GORE I WILL HIT YOU
etc.

Copycat

I totally did that too. Only I didn’t. Instead I stiffed this girl who wanted to be my guest but was kind of scaring me with her overaggressiveness and so even though I totally could have hit it and she would have eaten me alive, I just kinda ditched her like a scaredy cat. But other than that, this graduation was exactly like mine.

I have GOT to get back to NYC

Just to see this play. Seriously.

The troof

Dipshits who need to speed have small dicks

Anti-speeding ad wags fingers
CANBERRA, Australia, June 26 UPI — An Australian anti-speeding TV ad features young women making hand gestures at a speeder that imply the target has a small penis.

The campaign features young women, an elderly woman and other young men not in the drivers seat wiggling their little fingers in a gesture that implies the speeder is poorly endowed

I know of at least one dissociative stalker going through a perpetual midlife crisis to which this applies. Tiny, dude. Tie-knee.

Why the Gong Show was Cancelled

Ah, those lost innocent days of yore.

Welcome to Craigslist

As part of my moving, I thought I’d throw some stuff on CL at insanely low prices (I usually just donate, but I figured what the hell). Anyway, I had this computer desk that we got for >$100 in NYC for Voldemort back in my 2L year. It’s not worth nearly that much, but it’s still useful and in great shape, so I put it up for the “why not?” price of $25.

Here’s my favorite response. It also happens to be the best exemplar of the CL buyerflake, evar!

From: [name withheld] <[something]@hotmail.com>
Subject: Desk.
To: [me]

I can come tonight and pick up your desk & haul it away.

I have $23 bucks in my purse at this very moment. Are you set on 25?

AWESOME!

I ended up just donating the desk, btw.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that

Sorry, there’s been a job search going on and big networking changes at work made the blogging more difficult (well, sorta. I was also burnt out).

But … I’ve got a new job… which will keep me super busy and I’ll be a Very Important Person and all that now, but also requires moving to a whole new area where I figure I’m going to have nothing to do in the evenings except comment about the world. And how hot it is there.

Like, seriously hot.

Have I mentioned it’s hot yet? Because it is. Supposedly. But I trust those in the know. And they say it’s hot. So… hot! Hotty hot hot hot. This kind of hot:

Not Jessica Biel-kind of hawt. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Anyhoo, I’ll be back, bitches. Prepare yourselves.

A word of warning

If anyone spoils any part of the plot events of The Sopranos final season before I get a chance to see it on DVD is going to need some serious padding around the nether regions due to the asskicking that will commence.

This is brought about because no less than 5 blog posts today have started with something like “not to spoil anything with The Sopranos, but…” and then, of course, go on to spoil the plot event. So far I’ve managed to avoid contamination, but if anyone else keeps this up, I’m calling Jeff Gillooly.

You have been warned.

Just in time for mother's day

a new affiliate relationship! I always use FTD.com when ordering for deliveries anyway, so I figure… why not be an affiliate? Same selection and prices to you… and maybe I can pay for hosting.

Here’s the deal, 10% off for Mother’s Day:

Enjoy

Probably not what he had in mind

Ooops

A man died while trying to outdo a rival with an acrobatic move while “battle dancing,” police said.

Robert Stitt, 48, and his rival were competing in a parking lot Monday night when he tried a forward flip and landed on his head.

Dammit, I need a new death scene now. This guy just stole all my thunder. He’s a death plagiarist!

Best. Headline. EVAR!

Seriously awesome

Royals To Get A Taste Of Angels’ Colon

This is right up there with my [team] hits Bong Hard headline o’ my deams (Bong was a pitcher with the Braves a couple years back)

Somebody needs to call facilities management

From today’s game-weather report for the KC@MIN contest:

59°F - Mostly cloudy. Refreshingly cool. Wind: 9mph/NE

Now, first, I love that it’s “refreshingly cool.” It’s like a mint patty of a baseball game.

But the even better part is the 9mph wind… inside the Metrodome. Did Gigantaur attack and no one tell us?

From the unfortunate product name files

Amazon.com: KitchenAid Hand Blender.

Despite its name it is not, apparently, meant for the blending of hands.

The Inbox Of Nardo Pace

The Inbox Of Nardo Pace, The Empire’s Worst Engineer

Subject Trash Compactor
From Death Star Detention Level Janitor Date A Long Time Ago 7:46 PM
To Nardo Pace

Hey, kid. That trash compactor you designed is up and running and I’ve got to say it looks great. Lots of grime, a magnetically sealed hatch that can’t be opened from the inside, a tentacled garbage creature that practically serves no purpose at all. It’s got everything a salty old janitor could ever want.

good times. Palpatine was my favorite.

Interesting

… hey, it’s better than that execrable Tori Amos version of Smells Like Teen Spirit.

This is analogous to my job search

Fuckin Courtney Love

So a commercial comes on today for a new baseball game for some console. Graphics look great, yadda yadda… hey, wait a minute. What’s that song they’re using?

Breed by Nirvana.

Nirvana. In a commercial. For a video game.

May the gods smite you but good, Courtney. But. Good.

Things I do not believe in

(though I may have at one time)

Karma
Choosing your own reality
Free will
.
.
.
Hope.

Nothing like having a noveau riche climber obsessed with ostentatious displays of prosperity and having ‘made it’ with one-half your brains and one-third your talent being in a position of gatekeeper to your career. Frustrated? Moi? Ohhh… a tad.

The Office mmmurder

(in the spirit of Shine)

Food Pix and Recipes

Was trying to figure out something interesting to cook and happened upon Tastespotting, which has tons of nice pics of food and recipes on how to make them.

Thought I’d share.

For those using Firefox with Adblock (and probably the Adblock Filterset G Updater), all the images will be blocked unless you remove espotting.com from the domain list.

Everything you need to know about Big Pharma

They’re evil and they only care about your health if it helps their profitability.

It is expected there would be no problems securing funding to explore a drug that could shrink cancerous tumors and has no side-effects in humans, but University of Alberta researcher Evangelos Michelakis has hit a stalemate with the private sector who would normally fund such a venture.

Michelakis’ drug is none other than dichloroacetate (DCA), a drug which cannot be patented and costs pennies to make.

It’s no wonder he can’t secure the $400-600 million needed to conduct human trials with the medicine - the drug doesn’t have the potential to make enough money.

Michelakis told reporters they will be applying to public agencies for funding, as pharmaceuticals are reluctant to pick up the drug.

At roughly $2 a dose, there isn’t much chance to make a billion on the cancer treatment over the long term.

According to research on DCA, formerly used to fight metabolic disease in children, the drug apparently revitalizes damaged mitochondria in cancer cells, effectively triggering cell death and shrinking the cells.

“One of the really exciting things about this compound is that it might be able to treat many different forms of cancer,” explained Michelakis.

This is also a large part of what’s wrong with the American medical system.

Who would ever want a $2 pill that shrinks/kills tumors with no side effects? Don’t be ridiculous. The mere idea of such a thing being desirable is absurd.

Kick some of that big-C ass, jane

Best wishes and have a speedy recovery.

Good luck, Jane

Best wishes

Way better than dick in a box

Speak of the devil...

Because it's stuck in my head, that's why

enjoy

Man down! Man down!

First billmon closes up shop (again… but you’ll be back!) and now Berube augers in.

The dynamics of the ebb and flow of blogging are interesting. The demands of always having something to say about whatever it is that is most cutting edge can be draining. Which is why you have so much burnout and turnover. From my experience (and I’ve been doing this since 1997), it’s best to just go fallow for a bit and post when you feel like it. After all, it’s not like the site is going anywhere. If you make grandiose proclamations and farewells… you’re kind of stuck. If you come back, it will have been like staging your own funeral or eleventieth birthday party only to show up at the next summer’s barbecue wearing a hawaiian shirt and birkenstocks.

And no one likes birkenstocks. Except those freaks who wear them. *shudder*

Come on back anytime, billmon and Berube. Our door’s always open. Oh, and someone light a candle for Greenwald. He’s burning his candle at both ends. Would hate to see him end up like JoplinMoonHendrixMorrison. No, really.

No Surge

Though We, the People, are essentially powerless to stop this insane escalation of an idiotic war as perpetuated by an unaccountable authoritarian/Caligula-liite, I cannot stand idly by as the AWOL preznit sends more of your sons and daughters to die in the sands of Iraq.

No Surge.

No McCain/Lieberman magic pony plan.

No Surge.

No Bush/Cheney oedipal dreams of imperial grandeur.

No more.

If you can call your congresscritters to register your opposition to this latest infernal idiocy (which, by the way, is also a precursor to the likely upcoming naval and air strikes on Iran - this is America, how?). You are not alone and maybe, just maybe, enough voices working together can stop this insanity.

Hungry For a Month

As an experiment, one noble soul decided to try to spend $30 total for all his food for a month.

For the month of November, I'm only spending $30 on food. The only exception will be things that are freely available to the average person salt taken from restaurants, sauce packets from Taco Bell, free coffee from an office. Buying in advance is fine, but at the end of the month, it all has to add up to $30 or less.

Interesting and provocative experience. And he donated his saved money to a food bank, which was an awesome gesture.

What Does 200 Calories Look Like?

Wisegeek has this cool picture gallery (arranged by mass) of what 200 calories looks like. If you’re watching your calories this is pretty interesting. Even if it’s not it’s almost artistic. Almost.